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Thread: Practising Higher Principles in an Indifferent Environment.

  1. #1
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    Practising Higher Principles in an Indifferent Environment.

    Below, I am sharing some of my observations from a typical day in an Indian metro. I would be interested to have your views on the same:

    Life in the office has become more & more competitive. Where performance measurement norms have become more stringent and the gap between spoils for a higher performer are lower becoming wider, the bonhomie that used to exist between you and your peers 14 yrs back (when I started my career) is simply not there! These days, I get a distinct feeling that others come over to your desk only for two reasons - either to get some work done (work as defined by the organization) or to gain influence with you if you happen to have a political clout. There is no such thing as a casual chat over a cup of tea! In such a materialistic and result oriented environment, the natural tendency of a bhakta's mind (which is influenced by thoughts of selflessness joy of sharing) is to hit back with the thought -- "if you dont care for me, so do I".. thus there is a strong tendency that if someone ignores you (when you are down in your career) to return the person in the same coin - a tit for tat reaction. I guess hitting back is a natural reaction of the mind.

    Questions:
    How does the bhakta "motivate" his mind to move beyond the normal reaction of "if you hit me with a brick, I will hit you back with a stone"? How does one convince mind to "steadfastedly" remain still in the higher principle of "go on doing your duty for a higher principle" when the environment is so
    indifferent and at times negative to such higher goals? How does one remain firm on ones goals (you will be kind to others - even if the other person is rude) when the external environment doesnt appreciate such things?

    Looking forward to hearing your practical suggestions.

  2. #2

    Re: Practising Higher Principles in an Indifferent Environment.

    Mastery over mind is not easy. It takes time, I would say years of dedicated daily Sadhana. If you are conscientious about it you will surely see an improvement. I have a better mastery over my mind as compared to 5 years ago. You cant expect results quick though. I am reminded of the Puranic story of how King Kaushik became Vishwamitra. Even after years and years of Tapas he still could not overcome lust and then finally anger. But he was finally successful just took a lot of time.

    Quote Originally Posted by surrenderindailylife View Post
    Questions:
    How does the bhakta "motivate" his mind to move beyond the normal reaction of "if you hit me with a brick, I will hit you back with a stone"? How does one convince mind to "steadfastedly" remain still in the higher principle of "go on doing your duty for a higher principle" when the environment is so
    indifferent and at times negative to such higher goals? How does one remain firm on ones goals (you will be kind to others - even if the other person is rude) when the external environment doesnt appreciate such things?

    Looking forward to hearing your practical suggestions.

    If you truly understand "duty" you will realize that the environment or external appreciation does not matter. You just have to do what you have to do.

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    Re: Practising Higher Principles in an Indifferent Environment.

    Also, i think there come a time when if you look in that Other's Beloved Eyes...you know who is truly looking at you.

    That doesn't mean you should be, a confused Portion of Beloved's, "personal punching bag". I always try to remove myself from any one confused enough to be harmful.

    But, in business, i always tell my Beloved Husband....imagine them as your child...think about what must have brought this individual to this state of anger...unhappiness. Think of this child...and be kind.

    Neutrality is wonderful in situations such as this...an affectionate observer.

    Be kind....but protect yourself.

    It does not matter if others appreciate your kindness, most often, they won't.

    You have to do it, without expecting anything back...

    As, often, our expectations upon other Portions causes even more frustration.

    My husband worked many years in the bowels of his company, primarily with Muslims. Many of these beings took his items, constantly...they came from homelands that had very desperate situations and their mindset did not change upon entering the U.S. They steal things...with his name engraved...and would be holding it in their hand...and tell him with a straight face..."No...Have not seen it."

    The women were worse than the men to him..often the men were very kind. But the women almost always pushed him around. Physically.

    To this i tell him...honey these ones...so pushed around by men....they have no outlett...be kind. So he went back...and every time he was pushed by a woman he bow slightly and say...forgive me.

    You know some of those women became great friends of his! An older African woman told those other women..."Leave him alone...his is my Brother!" lol it was wonderful:P

    All it took was an example of kindness...sometimes it in itself, can become viral!

    You focus on you and your goodness...and allow these others to keep pushing.

    If it help, think of them as your children...kindly consider they are not developed enough for such kindness. It's very waterboy-esque.

    The Water Boy is a very funny Adam Sandler movie...where the coach is very afraid and so The Water Boy suggest he see the one he is upset with as a lil baby.

    As silly as this is...it does work!

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    Re: Practising Higher Principles in an Indifferent Environment.

    Thank you , both of you. If I have understood it correctly - you mean 'goodness for the sake of goodness'. But practically, from my experience, you get beaten by badly (figuratively) if one follows this path. Or does one go the "wordly" way (where everything is a matter of give & take) in most of the wordly matters and practise selfless altruism in a path that is close to your heart (say - if you are a doctor treat patients free of charge if they belong to poorer section of society, while charging your regular fees with others)

  5. #5

    Re: Practising Higher Principles in an Indifferent Environment.

    Quote Originally Posted by surrenderindailylife View Post
    Thank you , both of you. If I have understood it correctly - you mean 'goodness for the sake of goodness'. But practically, from my experience, you get beaten by badly (figuratively) if one follows this path.
    I dont see why that needs to be the case. Can you be more specific? If you mean it is hard to practise Dharma in an adharmic environment I can give you examples where it has been done. It is not easy but can be done. Check this out:

    http://www.citehr.com/364992-madurai...dvantaged.html

    Quote Originally Posted by surrenderindailylife View Post
    Or does one go the "wordly" way (where everything is a matter of give & take) in most of the wordly matters and practise selfless altruism in a path that is close to your heart (say - if you are a doctor treat patients free of charge if they belong to poorer section of society, while charging your regular fees with others)
    What do you mean worldly way? If you are a Grihasta you have to make money. You have to do it dharmically that is all. Your doctor example is very appropriate. No one is saying the doctor should not make any money at all. HE/she can earn as much as possible but use it to help grow our religion.

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    Re: Practising Higher Principles in an Indifferent Environment.

    Goodness without expecting any goodness back, yes.

    But, just because one is good does not mean he will stand idly by and allow his child to be hurt...or himself even for that matter.

    Just today I was killing a huge queen wasp which tried to attack my daughter upon our own front porch as she come home from the bus. Literally...our children were being swarmed because the queens always come to our door. I used Raid.

    I suppose the most wonderful lesson in the world is that there is a time for goodness, and a time to defend...and also a time to remove yourself(when you can) from an abusive situation.

    With the wasp...in the woods...on a tree...i would never be forced to take action. Upon my door...and at my child...i have no choice.

    Just as the snake in the creek...can i blame this one if it become scared of me and strike? I am in its home...it's his rules.

    I suppose what i am trying to say is that each case is different...and each one will require you to think upon what action to take.

    Also, within the work situation. I am not saying you have to give out your daily meal to your co-workers or let them walk all over you. Kindness, itself, costs nothing. So open a door for others...or smile when someone seems to need a friendly face.

    Recently, a girl dropped a jar of baby food on my beautiful white shoes at the Kroger...and instead of being upset, i looked into her troubled Beloved Eyes...and then i say...

    "Last time we went here my husband and i dropped several glasses off the shelf and the whole shelf almost come down!"

    LOL this made her smile so big.

    It cost me nothing...but maybe some pride to tell this humilating story.

    But, that's the sort of kindness i was refering to...in no way should you ever allow yourself to be abused more than once. What i mean is...the first time...you may not know someone will behave such a way...but the second time on...you are just as guilty. For being in the presence of a snake...there's bound to be an unhealthy interaction.

    So the wasp was sprayed, but since that happened...i went ahead and spray the porch lightly with deterrent...which makes them not come here anymore.

    Sometimes, with ignorant beings....we have to do such things to prevent more harm.

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    Re: Practising Higher Principles in an Indifferent Environment.

    Quote Originally Posted by surrenderindailylife View Post
    Thank you , both of you. If I have understood it correctly - you mean 'goodness for the sake of goodness'. But practically, from my experience, you get beaten by badly (figuratively) if one follows this path. Or does one go the "wordly" way (where everything is a matter of give & take) in most of the wordly matters and practise selfless altruism in a path that is close to your heart (say - if you are a doctor treat patients free of charge if they belong to poorer section of society, while charging your regular fees with others)
    Vannakkam surrender: It's a fine line. You have to somehow know when to stand up for yourself, and not have people push you around. Some people will take such advantage of it, you will feel like a slave. Another view is that you're not doing those other jivas any good karmicly by letting them push you around.

    I taught for about 27 years. I often took the tougher assignments, the split classes, the higher enrollment classes. It seemed no one ever noticed that it was me that gave in, because I was the nice guy. I wanted a job, and was just happy to have one.

    But near the end of my career, my principal finally noticed, and said to the others, "This man has given in so many times. I think its time others did. Then he gave me the 'easy' assignments. But I think it is very difficult at times to work within dharma, and to be the nice guy all the time. Best luck with it. Some days you just have to stand up.

    This is also true of the Christian/Hindu problem. Its not the Christians giving in. Ironically, its a long standing problem ... just being too nice.

    Aum Namasivaya

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    Re: Practising Higher Principles in an Indifferent Environment.

    @ All: Thank you for your responses. Reading posts backed by "living" experiences is indeed a special enriching experience. Thanks once again.

    @ Seeker : The example quoted by you is apt and awe inspiring. Hats off to the concerned person - hero indeed! One question - From the example quoted, the concerned person has definited shown examplary courage which gets highlighted. But the point to be noted is this also call for sacrifies from his family. From my limited knowledge of how Government Services work in Indian situation, it is this point ("making your family sacrifice for something not related to them - i.e. matters dealing with your office) is something that makes some clear conscious officers give-in. If you are too upright, you are transferred to an terror infested area, which causes a lot of discomfort to your family life. This "punishment" culture is also prevalent in the private sector. I have seen personally, if you dont toe your boss's line, you are moved out to some inconsequential role and utimately "shown your place" in annual performance appraisals.

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    Re: Practising Higher Principles in an Indifferent Environment.

    Its in the history that Nice guys had been on the receiving end always.Since you are nice guys,its contrary to your nature to offence or even counter-defence. This happened to pandavas who suffered silently for 18 years.

    The way is to keep the sanity inside and behave outwardly like world behaves with you.But to keep the peace/sanity inside intact without any real anger/dwesha is a matter of sadhna.Just like a snake, show agression by voice without really biting.
    Man-naathah Shri Jagan-nathah Mat-guru-shri jagad-guruhu.
    Mad-atma sarva-bhutatma tasmai Shri Gurave Namah.


    My Lord is the Lord of Universe; My teacher is the teacher of the
    entire universe; and my Self is the Self of all. My salutations at the lotus-feet
    of such a Guru, who has revealed such knowledge to me.

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    Re: Practising Higher Principles in an Indifferent Environment.

    I can post some best practices from my experience of 26 years in job and 40 (out of 50) as responsibility of being eldest son.

    1. Love all unilaterally. Love is developed when one sees only the good in others. Good means what one has in common and what is universally appreciated. No one is perfect so seeing negetives only decreases love.

    2. Help others and share knowledge as much as practicable. This enhances one's demand and reputation. By sharing knowledge, one share the power of knowledge and increase the power of the team.

    3. Run after excellence through devotion and focus. Never run after money and power. What one does can give only satisfaction and happiness. What one gets or desires can give lots of pains. What one can do is in one's control (somewhat). What one gets, is totally not in one's control. In long term one will see that money and position are running after him.

    4. Keep mind clean. As far as possible try to be truthful (99%) as lies only increase stress between body and mind, you and others, etc. Accept faults, apologise - it does not lower dignity but increases it, moreover it helps build relationship.

    5. Derive the actions, relationship, management from the spiritual knowledge and the perspective of the discussions should be from that point. Spirituality helps us see the big picture - beyond our small relationships, managment or actions. Be it at home or office or any place.

    6. Children or wife or husband are god's gift to us as our companion in journey. We have duties towards children to bring them upto a level so that they can tend to themselves. This duty is unidirectional and they are meant for different family. Wife or Husband is more permanent to each other, so accept that as reality, rather than getting attached to children. The role one plays, needs to be a combination of Father or Mother and Manager mixed which is situation dependent. Managing relationship is an art which needs the mind to think beyond who one is.

    7. The chair or role one has in office is permanent. Person is temporarily holding that post. The Post or Role is not the person. So think, how that role or post will be best served. If that is not the person - he should move out. Serve the post or role and do not serve yourself.

    6. Body is the temple through which the mind works and also changes its state. So respect that and try to keep mind and body aligned.

    Sorry lots of gyan. Forget and get on with life.
    Love and best wishes:hug:

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